zg_shadows | [Garou] Heartbeats

So, Zeitgeist garou especially, has talked of "heartbeats" as a measure of time, 9 heartbeats before a challenge.
But heartbeats don't have to just measure seconds.

(Be warned, very slightly indulgent fic)

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It all comes down to heartbeats, miniscule moments in time, life breaks down into those moments… so does death.

I watch from under the wig, wishing it was less itchy, the stench from the piss stained jacket burns at my eyes. I don’t have a watch on, so all I can do is count heartbeats.
I hear the train approaching, time starts.

I see Raven move into position far to my right at the end of the platform, large handbag looking almost ridiculous on her arm.

Thunders Fury’s bitching drifts across my senses as she pushes her way through the masses to the left all heckling for a good position to get onto the train.

Wyrm Blood Boiling pushes his way past me taking up position just steps to my left.

Ten heartbeats gone…

The target steps forward, Wyrm Blood steps forward with him to one side.

Twelve heartbeats gone..

The lights from the train appear in the tunnel, we can hear the squealing of the brakes now, for a moment almost drowning out Ravens scream as Thunders Trick appears as if out of nowhere and runs full pelt off the platform with her handbag.

Thirteen heartbeats gone

The platform turns, like the good sheep they are, to see what the screaming is about, as Thunders Fury trips over a projecting umbrella, causing commotion down the other end, drawing attention that way.

Fourteen heartbeats gone
Wyrm Blood’s large form blocks view of the target from all those not distracted, I have only heartbeats to act. The knife stabs again and again, the wounds gush and bleed and as the shock crosses their face a light push topples them onto the tracks, nobody is looking, everything else is too exciting, I step back two steps and yell for help as I see the train reach the point where the brakes won’t stop it on time, there won’t be enough left to show the stabwounds.

Sixteen heartbeats gone..
The stench rises, it’s not one I’ll ever purge from my memory, chaos hits the platform as people vomit and scream and run, I let the crowd sweep me away, and know in heartbeats time, my disguise will be changed and I’ll never be traced to this incident.

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It all comes down to heartbeats, miniscule moments in time, life breaks down into those moments… so does pain.

His starts to slow, as he eases back on the beating, letting the bat swing back and forth loosely in his hands, taking his time now, no longer a frenzied pummelling but a more calculating striking of key sensitive areas. Finally slowing to its normal rate as I swing back and forth from the tree.

Mine beating hard and fast as I realises my predicament, realise what my capture really means for me at this time. The fear of death singing its way through my veins in heart bursting adrenaline rushes. Until he stop, and it flutters with hope for a moment as the smallest and weakest looking member steps forward, with a smile that could almost be called impish. Surely that’s not somebody to fear.

Soon however I realise my mistake, and life is still only moments, moments of screaming agony as my skin is slowly and almost tenderly sliced from my body, and moments of blissful blackness as I lose consciousness for brief interludes of peace. Moments of weakness as my resolve almost fails and I try to scream out the names she wants to hear, moments of bitterness that again I am told I’m not “worthy” of the skin I fought hard to earn, moments of hatred for all that they stand for… moments of guilt for what I did to get what I have.

Heartbeats of my life flash before my eyes, first car, first kiss, first cigarette, first hangover, last words I spoke to my family, anger, hatred, jealousy, greed, acceptance, bitterness... that LOOK in the eyes of those I stole from. I realise I never did call that hot girl who gave me her number last week, and the absurdity of this realisation brings a hoarse chuckle to my lips, swiftly turned to a choking bubble as the blood from my wounds runs to my throat and gags me.

But still the promise that my heart will beat on, that my life will continue, if only I’ll speak some names, such a little thing for such a precious gift, and with the oath that she’ll not kill me if they’re given, my resolve shatters and names spill from me like the blackened blood that spills from the gashes I’m covered in.

The promise is kept, and she turns to walk away, calmly wiping the knives that have tormented me for lifetimes it seems, more heartbeats to come, more moments of life.

Shattered in two words, as she simply says “I lied”.

A moment of fear
A moment of anger
A moment of gutwrenching terror, the last heartbeats of my life, the last moments I’ll have, as three black wolves hurl themselves at me and the world goes dark for the last time.

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It all comes down to heartbeats, miniscule moments in time, life breaks down into those moments…

I lie there in the dark, fighting the need for sleep, knowing that if I do, tonight of all nights she’ll come to me in my dreams, that tonight of all nights I’ll remember exactly why I am who I am.
Instead I lie there thinking, thinking over the moments that lead to now, looking back I see a clear path, but looking forward I was blind to it. As tick follows tock, and tock follows tick, each step on the path, each heartbeat of life, clearly lead to now.

The strike, so meticulously planned
The survivor who escaped
The one thing we never expected… the counterattack
The attack in the middle of the night
The panic
The anger
Feeling the blade plunge into me, knowing full well from the sensation that it’s hit something vital
Hearing the shotgun blast at the same time and seeing it connect full force with Raven, sending her slumping to the ground
My rage pulling me back to my feet, taking over me
The fury
Thunder Fury physically peeling me off a corpse and punching my throat till I gagged
Rites of cleansing all round, under the clouds as the rain lashed down on us
Seeing her walk back over, with barely a mark on her
The pub
The bar
The other bar
The trailer and the last few bottles we had left, just her and I now, the others having decided that no amount of mockery would make get them to risk even worse hangovers than they already had
The argument that she shouldn’t be near the fighting
Her trying to hit me with a nearby bottle
Me pinning her to the wall…

The kiss, I don’t even remember who started it, maybe we both did…
The rest of the night…

Who knows now where the path will take us, in years to come this moment will be but one heartbeat in a sea of them, but right now it is a sea of its own.

And my heart beats on, if in a whole new way…