a small death, keep on walking.
Mar. 29th, 2009 09:27 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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zg_shadowsi don't realy know where it went wrong, maybe it began at crouch end where i seaced to be dead. had i just taken the free ticket and ran then i could have made a whole new life. alone.
a life of shadows still and blood, but no chance at a pack, forever i would be denied the warmth of home from the brothers and sisters of the sword. lost the chance to find others to hunt with and know that compleat bliss, nomater what my ass was being looked out for.
but no i did not walk into the unknowen a creatcher that i had never even known exsisted, werewolfs yes, my long lost cusons. but werespiders, this was to alien for me. so i sought my famoly as i had began to think of them.
maybe it went wrong where i out of a missgided atempt to show a hurt brother compashin and offer my condolancers. ha.
that got me little but harsh words... and... past draged to the fourfront of my mind. it was a shock to know i had been mindprobed and i let the impolight matter drop. my brother was hurting and the saying goes we lash out when feeling vunrable.
then i should have left, not just walked, holding my beast holwing inside, to a quiet spot of the essbat. yes leaving now would have been wise.
but i did not, like a fool i remained attering a calm. words fillter over to me, i could feel the way my sence higtened and know each ear twiched at such formiler phrazers. cutting, dread wash over my already slashed, torn beast and watched as in disbleafe as a hunter stood being welcomed. spoken with respect, given welcome.
a hunter. here.
leaving now was not an option, blood oath hold me! how i managed to stay so silent, oberving clarifying and ashamed that my new famoly welcomed such skum.
'once a hunter always a hunter, you do not bargin with them, you do not seek controle them. you run or you kill them.' sage words of my maker, my alpha.... father.
with death cries ringing in my eyes, blood tining my eyes and pain like he had staked my heart, being told i was to voldrie with him was not good timing.
then my death was sealed, how could i have hoped ellen would have not noicec one little gangrell clining to her last tatted controle over the inner rage. blood oath skriming for payment and they wished me to shair blood, our sacrid gift, with.... a hunter.
no its allthe answer i could give praying to cain she would understand. cain was deaf to me. maybe i was never his child even thow i tried so hard. had i walked alone to long? packless and so created a rift between him and i?
i can say i walked with honer, clear of mind of my cource of action, even as my body phycaly shook, not fear, but controle ridged, inner sredding controle. i walked wheponles to face my death. of the three options this was the only path i could walk. you do not leave cain, i never wanted to. nor would i swollow my pride and shair blood with him. i refuced a tainted god that he was my alpha, why would i change now for one hunter.
no death was all this funny little story held.
i'd like to think of myself as honrable, i there was never a hope for me. this i accepted when i rose from my croutch. he was polight for a hunter, removing him self off the halowed ground. he even asked what would happen after i died. i have no pack to avenge me.
i was the last of the shadow walkers, those that romed the moors of the south. masicaed by his kinds hand. there would be no one to howl my name in loss, non to feel the loss of my body in the hunt. alone.
the strike was true. as i would expect. i could have posably accessed one of my new forms to try and cheat death.
ironic, alone facing one of the catholic dogs and i felt at peace in those last seconds. i had always sought comfort from others to be pack. but alone.... ahhh now i have seen the face of death and found comfort.
wolfsbain, clan gangreall, daughter of cain.
a life of shadows still and blood, but no chance at a pack, forever i would be denied the warmth of home from the brothers and sisters of the sword. lost the chance to find others to hunt with and know that compleat bliss, nomater what my ass was being looked out for.
but no i did not walk into the unknowen a creatcher that i had never even known exsisted, werewolfs yes, my long lost cusons. but werespiders, this was to alien for me. so i sought my famoly as i had began to think of them.
maybe it went wrong where i out of a missgided atempt to show a hurt brother compashin and offer my condolancers. ha.
that got me little but harsh words... and... past draged to the fourfront of my mind. it was a shock to know i had been mindprobed and i let the impolight matter drop. my brother was hurting and the saying goes we lash out when feeling vunrable.
then i should have left, not just walked, holding my beast holwing inside, to a quiet spot of the essbat. yes leaving now would have been wise.
but i did not, like a fool i remained attering a calm. words fillter over to me, i could feel the way my sence higtened and know each ear twiched at such formiler phrazers. cutting, dread wash over my already slashed, torn beast and watched as in disbleafe as a hunter stood being welcomed. spoken with respect, given welcome.
a hunter. here.
leaving now was not an option, blood oath hold me! how i managed to stay so silent, oberving clarifying and ashamed that my new famoly welcomed such skum.
'once a hunter always a hunter, you do not bargin with them, you do not seek controle them. you run or you kill them.' sage words of my maker, my alpha.... father.
with death cries ringing in my eyes, blood tining my eyes and pain like he had staked my heart, being told i was to voldrie with him was not good timing.
then my death was sealed, how could i have hoped ellen would have not noicec one little gangrell clining to her last tatted controle over the inner rage. blood oath skriming for payment and they wished me to shair blood, our sacrid gift, with.... a hunter.
no its allthe answer i could give praying to cain she would understand. cain was deaf to me. maybe i was never his child even thow i tried so hard. had i walked alone to long? packless and so created a rift between him and i?
i can say i walked with honer, clear of mind of my cource of action, even as my body phycaly shook, not fear, but controle ridged, inner sredding controle. i walked wheponles to face my death. of the three options this was the only path i could walk. you do not leave cain, i never wanted to. nor would i swollow my pride and shair blood with him. i refuced a tainted god that he was my alpha, why would i change now for one hunter.
no death was all this funny little story held.
i'd like to think of myself as honrable, i there was never a hope for me. this i accepted when i rose from my croutch. he was polight for a hunter, removing him self off the halowed ground. he even asked what would happen after i died. i have no pack to avenge me.
i was the last of the shadow walkers, those that romed the moors of the south. masicaed by his kinds hand. there would be no one to howl my name in loss, non to feel the loss of my body in the hunt. alone.
the strike was true. as i would expect. i could have posably accessed one of my new forms to try and cheat death.
ironic, alone facing one of the catholic dogs and i felt at peace in those last seconds. i had always sought comfort from others to be pack. but alone.... ahhh now i have seen the face of death and found comfort.
wolfsbain, clan gangreall, daughter of cain.
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Date: 2009-03-30 09:36 am (UTC)Face may have had the monumental die or fall choice from a being of doom but this death was no less as impressive because of the participants (insert warm applause)