zg_shadows | Dulce et decorum est

I’m dying Jamie. I think this is really it this time: I’ve run out of second chances.

We couldn’t come to England. Paddy said there would be plenty to fight right here and he wasn’t wrong. I stood behind my alpha and thought about everything the world would lose if we gave in, took that rage and made it into a weapon. I don’t know how many fell on either side or who won. Not that it matters – there’s only so much even a garou can take and it’s hard to hold your drink when you haven’t got a stomach to hold it in. It hurts much more this time around.

In the corners of my eyes I keep seeing faces who can't be here: Fells Trees, Skoll Fire, 'Trina. Could have sworn I saw Lexx but he was always a tricky sod to pin down. All dead of course – perhaps they've come to fetch me.

Tailfeathers and Stash are somewhere behind me. Lost them in the crush. Paddy got taken down by some big bastard with an axe. At least I think it was an axe but it might have been his arm. Someone's used the kin to decorate the pine trees. Shit.

Remember Oxford? First time we met. I was a stroppy little brat. Tailfeathers'd say I still am. We did good in Oxford.

It’s so cold Jamie. The sky is on fire but I’m so very cold.

Gotta look after myself. Rat said so. Rat says stand up. Rat says turn around 3 times. Deep breath, focus, this is no time to go mad.

I’ve tried… oh gods it hurts…I’ve tried to live up to London. Gave so much for me and I gave shit. S'why I came here: start again. Cold Water's a last chance sept –flotsam and jetsam of the nation. But I built something here. I had a pack and a purpose, I fought… argh… fought the wyrm wherever it…

Try not to ju… oh, too late. When evening is spread out across the sky, like a patient etherised upon the table.

Came too far, didn’t I? You’re somewhere on the other side of the world and I can’t say goodbye. I hope whoever sings your song remembers the offside rule. I lo…

The woman’s eyes flickered closed and the ragged pulse finally stopped beating.